Girls

There is great reward for raising girls in islam. I just read this hadith and felt inspired.

"The Prophet (SAW) said: 

'Whoever supports two little girls until they come of age, will be on the Day of Judgement as close to me as this,' and he brought two fingers together."

[Muslim]

My two girls are a blessing alhamdulilah :-)

Also I thought I'd share some pictures my lovely 10 year old daughter took with my digital camera

Wishing you all a Ramadan Mubarak!

The life of Muhammed (pbuh)

I am reading this book on the life of the prophet by Martin Lings.

It is one of the best books I have read about our beloved prophet (pbuh). It is the only book I have actually enjoyed reading. It offers the reader an amazing and unique insight into the life of our beautiful prophet. I recommend it to everyone.

Let them make a mess

Today my 10 year old daughter cooked for me. It wasn't anything complicated. She made baked potato with tuna and cheese topping.

As I drove home from work I was thinking about what I could cook. It needed to be something nice, fast and simple cause my kids were hungry.

I walked through the door at 4.30pm and rushed to make some phone calls before the close of business. I heard my kids rattling in the kitchen. I thought they were looking for something to eat so I ignored it while I made my phone calls.

About 30 minutes later I walked into the kitchen. My daughter had her cookbook spread out on the bench which we had borrowed from the library a few weeks earlier, a potato cooking in the oven and tuna which had been crushed in a bowl with onion. I looked around the kitchen and cringed at the mess she had made, but I bit my tongue.

She looked at me with a big smile and said to me 'Mum I'm cooking for you'. I smiled at her while the thoughts circulated in my head about the mess she had made. I kept telling myself let her cook, she wants to cook, she needs to make a mess to learn. She had been nagging me for weeks to take her grocery shopping and let her buy the ingredients so she could cook but I had kept putting it off. I felt bad and instantly changed my tune. I helped her cut the potato and showed her how to assemble the tuna and cheese on top and put the peas and corn to boil on the stovetop.Afterwards we sat down and ate them and I must say they were pretty tasty!

I have decided to let her cook more often. It builds confidence, personal responsibility and independence and that  is what I want to foster in my children.

I grew up with an extremely controlling mother who would get angry if I poured the water the wrong way or if I didn't put a plate or bottle back in the fridge the way she wanted. My mother was even bathing me when I was 13! I never learnt how do things for myself and therefore lacked confidence, was insecure and afraid to try new things. This lasted throughout my teenager and early adulthood years alhamdulilah I am different now.

I have learnt from my mothers mistakes and I am sure my kids will also learn from mine one day. So from this day forward I will let them make a mess!

Ramadan

The blessed month of Ramadan is only days away. This year I feel a sense of peace and excitment for this blessed time and I am really looking forward to it.

I'm sad to say the past few ramadans I have really struggled with my faith, worship and motivation because I was going through hard times. This year I feel stronger, wiser and my imaan is higher alhamdulilah.

These are the things I want to do this year inshallah:

Read the Quran as much as I can

Pray with more kushoo

Have more patience

Read Islamic stories to my kids and give them a real sense of Ramadan this year

Help a needy person/family

Be generous in charity

Make dua

These are my goals. I'm putting them here because when I am lacking, tired, sad or fed up I can remind myself and stick to them.

May Allah give me the patience and strength to fulfill my goals. Ameen.

I wish you all a happy, blessed month. May Allah accept our fasts. Ameen.

Oppression

I have always had a strong sense of fairness and justice.
I hate oppression. I detest it. I hate the silence by the 'good people' over oppression.
I have got myself in trouble many times for 'speaking up'.
People don't want to know, they don't care, they turn a blind.
Well I can't remain silent, I need to speak up and always will inshallah.

Here are some hadiths about oppression to ponder over. Our beloved prophet hated oppression. Islam is so just if only people were.

Narrated Abu Ma'bad, that the Prophet said, "... and be afraid of the curse of an oppressed person because there is no screen between his invocation and Allah." Sahih Bukhari: Volume 2, Book 24, Number 573.

 Narrated Anas: Allah's Apostle said, "Help your brother, whether he is an oppressor or he is an oppressed one. People asked, "O Allah's Apostle! It is all right to help him if he is oppressed, but how should we help him if he is an oppressor?" The Prophet said, "By preventing him from oppressing others." Sahih Bukhari: Volume 3, Book 43, Number 624.

Narrated 'Abdullah bin Umar: Allah's Apostle said, "A Muslim is a brother of another Muslim, so he should not oppress him, nor should he hand him over to an oppressor. Whoever fulfilled the needs of his brother, Allah will fulfill his needs; whoever brought his (Muslim) brother out of a discomfort, Allah will bring him out of the discomforts of the Day of Resurrection, and whoever screened a Muslim, Allah will screen him on the Day of Resurrection . " Sahih Bukahri: Volume 3, Book 43, Number 622.

Narrated Abu Dharr: Allah's Apostle (peace_be_upon_him) stated that Allah, the Exalted and Glorious, said: My servants, I have made oppression unlawful for Me and unlawful for you, so do not commit oppression against one another. My servants, all of you are liable to err except one whom I guide on the right path, so seek right guidance from Me so that I may direct you to the right path. O My servants, all of you are hungry (need) except the one whom I feed, so beg food from Me, so that I may give it to you. O My servants, all of you are naked (need clothes) except the one whom I provide with garments, so beg clothes from Me, so that I may clothe you. O My servants, you commit error night and day and I am there to pardon your sins, so beg pardon from Me so that I may grant you pardon.

And finally this quote by Martin Luther King 

~ The ultimate tragedy is not the oppression and cruelty by the bad people but the silence over that by the good people. ~  

Reading

I heart reading.

I learned to be a better person through reading. I loved escaping in my books as a young child and read everything I could get my hands on. I believe reading is part of the reason I am the person today. Through life experiences and reading I have gained strength, courage, compassion and have dared to dream  that I could be the person I want inshallah

Here is one of my favourite poems about reading:


The more you read,
The more you know.
The more you know,
The smarter you grow.
The smarter you grow,
The stronger your voice,
When speaking your mind
or making your choice.
(author unknown)

The 'naughty' little boy

There is a little boy I know,  lets call him 'Ali'.

Ali attends the Islamic School I work at. He is five, quite intelligent for his age and very cute mashallah.

Ali is an angry boy. He lashes out at other students and even attacked his class teacher, so he was removed from the playground during recess and lunch break.

The teachers discussed what they were going to do with this 'troublesome, angry' little boy. So it was decided Ali needed to be supervised by a teacher during recess and lunch until they decided what they wanted to do next.

I was one of teachers chosen to supervise. My coordinator handed me the roster and there I saw my name. I  was on the roster three out of the five days. I felt annoyed and exasperated. I was busy enough! I looked forward to my recess and lunch break. I needed a break from my students to recharge, eat my lunch, have a cup of tea, have a nice chat with the other teachers and read my book.


So I went the first time and met this little boy. We went to the library and had a little chat. He told me he wanted to play a game on the computer. I put one on for him and watched him play. He was so determined to to do everything himself. He hated me doing anything for him on the computer, he was fiercely independent and well spoken for his age. There was no hint of the 'troublesome' little boy. Everything went smoothly and I took him back to class.

The following day it was the same thing. We chatted for a bit longer and he requested the same game. I felt my heart starting to warm to this little boy and wondered to myself why he was getting in so much trouble so I decided to enquire about his family background.

I asked one of the other teachers who was also responsible for supervising him. She proceeded to tell me that little Ali and his brother has been placed with foster parents. I immediately felt my heart drop and continued to listen. Ali's mother used to beat her sons and as a consequence the Department Of Community Services (DOCS) had taken Ali and his brother away from her and placed him with a muslim foster family.

Everything made sense to me. Ali was angry and lashed out at everybody because he had learned from his carer that violence was a normal part of life and it was the way you dealt with your emotions. I felt all my annoyance and exasperation melt away. I wanted to take this little boy in my arms and hug him but it was not permissible.

There is always a story behind each child's 'behavioural problem' and this was Ali's.

May Allah preserve, protect him and heal his trauma. May Allah protect all  children from abuse and harm and give them warm, loving parents.

Ameen.